Lawyers

Cosmo Lists 5 Reasons to Date Lawyers
Download PDF

IMG_2277

Summary: Cosmopolitan magazine published 5 reasons to date a lawyer. 

Cosmopolitan is famous for its sex tips and covers with celebrities sporting va-va-voom hair. But now the glossy is venturing into the sex lives of lawyers, and their blanketed outlook is delightfully (or hilariously) optimistic, depending on your point of view.

  
What
Where


In general, we get it. People are obsessed with lawyers and want to date them. Why else would there be so many legal shows? Non-lawyers think all lawyers are rich, confident, and glamourous; and if they can’t go to law school themselves, then dating a lawyer is the next best thing, right?

Well, maybe.

Earlier this year, Cosmo released a list of 5 reasons to date a lawyer because they said, “[Lawyers] are a perfect mix of class and elegance!” While it seems that maybe no one over there had ever really hung out with an attorney, it was fun to read their reasons anyway.

Get JD Journal in Your Mail

Subscribe to our FREE daily news alerts and get the latest updates on the most happening events in the legal, business, and celebrity world. You also get your daily dose of humor and entertainment!!




Cosmo reason 1: “Lawyers are witty and well mannered.”

While attorneys have to be intelligent to get into law school, graduate, pass the bar, and make a living, that doesn’t guarantee that they all have amazing social skills to match their book smarts. But Cosmo believes all attorneys, male or female, are Benedict Cumberbatchs at parties.



“They’ll impress wherever they go,” Cosmo wrote. “And when they speak, they’ll leave your friends green with envy!”

It’s duly noted that Cosmo mentioned nothing about attorneys’ penchant for drinking, which often can make any old dud the life of a party, no matter their occupation.

Cosmo reason 2: “They always look good.”

While this reason may be superficial, lawyers do dress up more than most other professions, with clothing that is more conservative than trendy. So they have a point here. A nice suit can elevate anyone, and a nice suit on an already attractive person means mega hot status. Just look at legal superstars like Amal Clooney or Chief Justice John G. Roberts Jr.

However, Cosmo’s reasoning got a little absurd when they added, “There’s no need to be scared they’ll dress inappropriately when you want to introduce them to friends,” as if that’s a common problem…

Cosmo reason 3: “They have financial stability and good prospects.”

“They won’t be parasites to you, since they have an amazing profession! You’re covered!” Cosmo said about lawyers. This point works for BigLaw attorneys pulling in six figures annually, but Cosmo didn’t seem to take into account the thousands of other attorneys saddled with massive student loan debt. So for all the gold diggers, dating just any old lawyer isn’t a guaranteed pay day, but it is safe to say that if you date an attorney, you’ll probably never have to eat at an Arby’s again.

Cosmo reason 4. “They’re very supportive.”

The pay structure for lawyers is by the hour, which means they’re usually overworked and exhausted in order to buy those nice clothes and earn that paycheck that Cosmo likes so much. So although yes, some attorneys have a caring personality deep down, they’re often too exhausted to listen to their date whine about Sheila in accounting. Man, why is she rude? Anyway, Cosmo’s statement, “[Lawyers] give support to people every day. They’ll do much more for their boo,” doesn’t seem too realistic.

And also… how many lawyers call their lovers “boo?”

Cosmo reason 5: “They love discussions and arguments, so you never get bored”

The hopefulness of Cosmo’s article reaches a three exclamation point crescendo when it writes, “You’ll constantly be entertained with arguments, sound discussions and very good stories!” (If the lawyer isn’t so tired..,) “You’ll always learn new things, and there’s never gonna be a dull moment for you!” (Again, tired) “They’ll give you the biggest deal ever, cos you’ll never have to pay for legal services!!!” (This one could be true, but why do to that to your boo?!)

While we could all point out Cosmo’s naïveté, maybe it’s more fun to enter their shiny, glamourous world where lawyers all act like Atticus Fitch and look like Josh Charles and Juliana Marguiles.

What do you think of Cosmo’s list? Let us know in the comments below.

Photo courtesy of Wikimedia



 

BCG FEATURED JOB

Locations:

Keyword:



Search Now

Defense Attorney with 3-4 years of litigation experience

USA-CA-San Francisco

San Francisco office of our client seeks defense attorney with 3-4 years of solid litigation experie...

Apply Now

Attorney with 3-7 years of litigation experience

USA-IL-Chicago

Chicago office of our client seeks attorney with 3-7 years of litigation experience. The candidate s...

Apply Now

Mid-level IP Litigation Attorney with electrical engineering experience

USA-CA-San Francisco

San Francisco office of our client seeks mid-level intellectual property attorney with 3-5 years of ...

Apply Now

Labor and Employment Attorney with 3-4 years of litigation experience

USA-CA-Los Angeles

Los Angeles office of our client seeks labor and employment attorney with 3-4 years of litigation ex...

Apply Now

RELEVANT JOBS

Trust Administrative Associate / Office Manager

USA-NV-Reno

FIRM OVERVIEW: Laurel Trust Company (LTC) a retail trust company under organization in Reno, Nev...

Apply now

Associate Attorney

USA-NV-Minden

Over my objection, and after nineteen years together, my 69 year old partner is retiring.  I ne...

Apply now

Part-time Paralegal / Legal Assistant

USA-GA-McDonough

Family Law and Criminal Defense law firm is seeking part-time (20-30 hours per week w/ Flexible sche...

Apply now

Legal Assistant (Dallas)

USA-TX-Dallas

We are a growing firm in need of an experienced, reliable, flexible, and proactive litigation Legal ...

Apply now

Most Popular

SEARCH IN ARCHIVE

To Top