Opinion: Some Helpful Reminders for Your Upcoming Trip to Africa or the Middle East
by Edward H. Bastion, President of Delta Airlines Since the State Department warned Americans last week to take caution in…
humor
New Google Product Lets You Sync Your Shit
Technology giant Google is reportedly ready to introduce their newest venture. Called ‘SyncCast’, the new device is expected to revolutionize…
Opinion: To My Remaining Fans, I Have to Ask What I Could Possibly Do to Disappoint You More
by Alex Rodriguez Well, it looks like my career is just about over. The last few years I have dealt…
NSA Officials Organize Top-Secret Office Birthday Party
In yet another blow to the NSA’s clandestine operations, an anonymous hacker has gained access to secret intel this morning…
MLB Announces Steroid Era Hall of Fame
In a press conference earlier today, Major League Baseball commissioner Bud Selig announced his intention to create a new hall…
Bored Edward Snowden Begins Practicing Stand-Up Routine in Sheremetyevo Airport Baggage Claim
For a number of weeks, a weary and restless Edward Snowden has been seeking new ways to liven up his…
Kerry Advances Israel-Palestinian Communication to Facial Gestures
Speaking to a group of reporters earlier today, John Kerry announced that he was pleased by recent progress in discussions…
Rolling Stone Editor: “If You Think the Cover is Bad, Wait Until You See the Rest of the Issue”
Following public outrage over the photo of Dzhohkar Tsarnaev on the cover of the most recent Rolling Stone issue, editors…
Opinion: George Zimmerman? Never Heard Of The Guy!
By Shmuel Zimmermanstein What a week! I just moved into town, and the last few days I’ve had so many…
Opinion: I Have Nothing Useful to Contribute to the National Conversation on the George Zimmerman Trial
by Chris Matthews Good morning, my loyal fans. Looking around at what the news blogs, Twitter, and Joy Behar are…
Edward Snowden Denied Entrance to Holiday Inn Express in Moscow
Sources are reporting that Edward Snowden has continued to face difficulty in his search for accommodation, recently being denied admittance…
CIA Spokesperson: ‘I Am Lying To You All Right Now And Quite Frankly There Is No Reason My Position Should Exist’
After speaking to a group of reporters on a wide range of issues on Monday, Meredith Tortbaum, an official spokesperson…