X

Pricasso: Artiste Extraordinaire

Summary: Tom Patch has garnered the name “Pricasso” for painting with his penis.

Some people choose law school to follow their passion. It seems like a practical choice – job security, a good salary. But in this economy, amid lay-offs and pay cuts, you may be rethinking your decision to go into the field.

Fortunately, there are plenty of other options – including painting with your penis.

Yes, native Brit Tom Patch, aka “Pricasso,” paints with his penis. And now, finally, he has a chance to perform in public in the UK. He will be exhibiting his talent at London’s Sexpo from November 13-15.

Patch has been performing at Sexpo Australia for ten years, but this is the first time he will do so in his native UK. The Managing Director of Sexpo UK, Lee Schofield, tells the Mirror that they are “super excited to be welcoming such a talented and unique artist.” Schofield continues, “There are no other artists in the world like Pricasso and even I’m suffering from a very serious case of penis envy right now.”

After being rejected from art school in London, Patch moved to Australia, where he found the inspiration for his art.

“The idea popped into my head after seeing ‘Puppetry of the Penis,’ ” he tells the Beast. “I did try it but found it really hard in every sense of the word! … It took a couple of years to get good enough to perform in public.”

Part portraiture and part performance, Patch describes his process: “Firstly, I grab my penis and testicles and plunge the whole lot into a pot of paint. The combination of balls and dick holds lots of paint, so then I just scrub them all over the canvas, which I hold in one hand until the canvas is sufficiently covered.” Sometimes he masturbates so his “paintbrush” is stiff and on point.

The process sounds deceptively simple, but when you look at his art, it’s pretty cool. He mostly makes portraits – and they’re actually pretty good. They’re reminiscent of Gauguin’s Tahitian pieces: bright colors, bold lines, but with impressively detailed shading and features, considering the artist’s tool.

Oh, and to prevent confusion on the identity of the artist, he signs with a real paintbrush, the Beast noted. After all, an artist’s signature is important both to his legacy and to the legitimacy of the piece. Patch inserts a brush into his urethra and completes each painting with his, uh, John Hancock.

Unfortunately, it doesn’t look like Patch will be showcasing his talents in the United States anytime soon. American nudity laws are pretty strict, so his performance isn’t welcome here. Luckily, you can see Patch at work here (with his website, www.pricasso.com, featured prominently on his bare back).

Photo credits: Getty Images

Eliza Hecht: