Over the past few weeks I’ve been thinking about envy quite a lot, especially in how it affects my own internal dialogue. Through the blog world, social media, magazines, TV and our every day lives we are constantly comparing ourselves to the people around us. I know the “comparison trap” has been talked to death, but I think it’s more than just comparison – it’s about jealousy, envy, and learning to be grateful for our own lives and blessings.
Envy is something that I used to feel constantly – all day, every day. That girl running down the path, the cute couple at a restaurant, even my closest friends. However nowadays, these thoughts are few and far between. Whenever I do have a jealous pang I remind myself: you know nothing about their life and remember all the amazing things that you have been blessed with in your life.
But most importantly – what is the point? In the end, are these little things that you are envious of really important? No. My purpose in life is to fulfill God’s purpose for me, not to be the skinniest, the prettiest, the most stylish, the fastest, the strongest or anything else. Knowing and truly believing in that has lifted a huge weight off my shoulders and has given me so much comfort.
At the same time, remember to not squash your own spirit in fear that others will envy you. A friend of mine last week told me how she had recently become very invested in reading her bible: it was a necessary part of her day that calmed and centered her. Then she tried to explain it away, so that I didn’t feel envious since I said I hadn’t read a lot of the book.
Although I never want to be boastful or prideful (don’t get me wrong – I often am!) we shouldn’t downplay the joys in our life to make ourselves more humble. Maybe the joy you have will inspire someone else to work harder, look for more in their own life. Don’t hide your own joy for fear that others will resent you, because you might be the example that someone needs.
So remember – focus on you and your life, be grateful for all that you have, and live with love, joy and acceptance.
Do you struggle with envy?
What are ways that you deal with jealousy, envy and comparison?
Do you ever dim your own light so you don’t make others envious or resentful?