Law Life

Americans Excited for New Batch of Politicians to Criticize
Download PDF
1 Star2 Stars3 Stars4 Stars5 Stars (No Ratings Yet)
Loading...

According to reports from across the nation, following yesterday’s midterm election results, citizens around the United States are expressing their excitement that a new crop of officials will take over, fall short of expectations, and take the blame for the structural problems plaguing the government and country as a whole.

“As Americans, we expect and demand that when we have a problem with our government, we vote in a new set of people every now and then so we have new faces to blame,” said unemployed electrician Dennis Weems.

  
What
Where


“Allow me to use an allegory from my workplace. Imagine you had a broken lightbulb. Clearly, the best way to fix it would be to call the worst electricians in town, give them some duct tape, then call in new electricians once you get tired of the others’ failures. The government works the same way.”

One striking result of the election is the defeat of Tea Party candidates in several states. Ron Paul, an advocate of the group, told reporters that the organization wasn’t built to last forever.

“The Tea Party was a fun little project to get people distracted from the fact that the government as a whole is utterly broken from top to bottom,” he said.

Get JD Journal in Your Mail

Subscribe to our FREE daily news alerts and get the latest updates on the most happening events in the legal, business, and celebrity world. You also get your daily dose of humor and entertainment!!




“Like any other third party, once Americans realized the group was mostly empty rhetoric and was no better equipped than the Democrats or Republicans to enact reform, people got tired of it.”

But while the Tea Party may be on its way to extinction, a new liberal third party has recently formed in hopes of taking its place. The group is called ‘The Freedom Party’, and on its agenda will include items like reforestation and gun control. But in the first official statement from party leaders, they caution Americans not to get their hopes up as they have already had 54 bills struck down in Congress only a day after the elections.



After being informed of the election results, President Obama provided his take in a brief press conference at the White House this morning.

“Which issue are we doing here? New representatives? Eh… screw it I don’t have time for this one, let’s do an early lunch and do Obamacare in the afternoon,” he said.

Sources confirmed that at press time, the Freedom Party had its 55th bill voted down while Obama and his team got lunch at Arby’s.

Note: This article is satirical and does not reflect factual reporting.



 

BCG FEATURED JOB

Locations:

Keyword:



Search Now

Senior Antitrust Associate Attorney

USA-CA-San Diego

San Diego office of our client seeks Senior Antitrust Associate Attorney with 7 years of experience....

Apply Now

Senior Antitrust Attorney

USA-WA-Seattle

Seattle office of a BCG Attorney Search Top Ranked Law Firm seeks Senior Antitrust Attorney with 9 y...

Apply Now

Patent Attorney

USA-DC-Washington

Washington, D.C. office of a BCG Attorney Search Top Ranked Law Firm seeks Patent Attorney with 1 ye...

Apply Now

RELEVANT JOBS

Associate Attorney Veterans' Disability Benefits

USA-KS-Lawrence

We are looking for an Associate Attorney to join our national veterans\' disability law practice bas...

Apply now

Associate Attorney (5+ years)

USA-NV-Las Vegas

Overview:  Tyson Mendes is seeking an experienced litigation associate to join our team of a...

Apply now

Legal Assistant

USA-CA-San Rafael

TYSON & MENDES is looking for an EXPERIENCED LEGAL ASSISTANT to join our team of litigators. A succe...

Apply now

Associate Attorney (3+ years)

USA-NY-New York City

Overview:  Tyson & Mendes is seeking an attorney with 3+ years of defense experience in cons...

Apply now

Most Popular

SEARCH IN ARCHIVE

To Top