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Romney’s Debate Night Cheat Sheet

A few commentators have suggested that Romney cheated during the presidential debate, using crib notes to keep tab on his zingers. Speakers at these debates are barred from bringing notes.

The evidence is based on a mere few seconds when Romney approaches the podium and removes a white folded something from his front pants pockets. Commentators such as the Daily Kos find something especially sinister in keeping one’s alleged handkerchief in such careful order in such a pocket. The Daily Kos said, “I have never seen a man’s hanky be so uniform and flat coming from a front pant’s pocket. Back pocket, yes, breast pocket in a jacket, yes, but not from the front pant pocket.”

“A Romney spokeswoman says it was a handkerchief, but the Internet isn’t buying it,” claimed the Daily Beast, suggesting the internet is haunted by credulous idiots. They also bothered to call it “Hankeygate 2012,” a tired to the point of death reference to Nixon. Early this year, Romney’s Aide had made an Etch-a-Sketch metaphor commentators were calling “Etch a Sketch gate” being low, apparently, on imagination.

In response to the hoopla, a Romney Aide said simply, “It’s a handkerchief,” seemingly perceiving that a word more on the topic would be a waste of breath.

Nevertheless, for commentators to allege that Romney cheated in the debate suggests they were at least impressed.

Daniel June: Daniel June studied English literature at Michigan State University, graduating in 2003. Working a potpourri of jobs since, from cake-decorator to proofreader, his passion has always been writing, resulting in books of essays, novels, and children’s novellas.