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David Albo, State Delegate, Says his Transvaginal Bill Cost Him Vaginal Access

State Del. David Albo, a Republican from Fairfax Station, addressed the House of Delegates in a stand up routine about how controversy over his Transvaginal ultrasound bill cost him sex with his wife.

The address, which apparently was intended to relieve tensions between him and Democratic Delegate David Englin over the controversial bill, demanded an apology from Englin, who laughed the whole time, for the news report which accused Albo of “hating women.”

The bill in itself is a serious and anxious measure that Virginia is proposing to require transvaginal ultrasounds for anybody who wants an abortion.

Albo told his story by describing his return home, trying to make the moves on his wife, Rita, after their son went to bed. He set the scene of seduction with mood music (with slap-bass, which he reproduced with a cell phone during the routine), red wine, his “trademark move” of pretending to stretch to get his arm around his wife, and, strangely, his attempt to change the TV to the Redskins Channel, a team, he says, that his wife loves more than she loves him.

Before he could get to the channel, they ran across a news report about the bill he had signed in which Englin severely criticized Albo for subverting women’s rights. In a decision that he would later regret, he decided to watch the news story and see what was being said about him. It turned out to be nothing good. He was accused of “hating women,” among other things.

“The show’s over, and she looks at me and say, ‘I have to go to bed,'” said Albo to a laughing audience, and he then addressed Englin, “If the gentleman’s plan was to make sure there was one less Republican in the world, he did. I expect an apology from him later in person on the House Floor.”

Some have criticized Albo for making light of a serious issue. Others regard it as a human gesture to lighten up the stressful nature of the political situation.

Daniel June: Daniel June studied English literature at Michigan State University, graduating in 2003. Working a potpourri of jobs since, from cake-decorator to proofreader, his passion has always been writing, resulting in books of essays, novels, and children’s novellas.