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Inopportune Gust of Wind Exposes Witherspoon’s Butt
Conspiracy theorists often describe events in the news as pseudo-events calculated to convince the public that action must take place. For instance, 9-11 was an inside job, it is claimed, to get us to start a war in Afghanistan, and the Aurora theater shooting was staged, as was Sandy Hook, to put pressure on Republicans to concede that we need to compromise our gun rights and even repeal the second amendment. By this logic, then, perhaps Reese Witherspoon “accidentally” exposed her butt to distract us from what a dumbass she was when her husband was pulled over for drunk driving.
Dressed in brown heels, and an orange and white floral printed skirt, US Weekly characterizes the photo of her butt as a “wardrobe malfunction,” inspired by “an unruly gust of wind.” Some photographers happened to be shooting at that moment – which is an entirely creepy way to live – and Witherspoon only laughed a bit in a carefree way, and went about the rest of her day.
The “wardrobe malfunction” at least is harmless, as compared to the real embarrassment of her drunken antics, of which she said that “Out of respect for the ongoing legal situation, I cannot comment on everything that is being reported right now. But I do want to say, I clearly had one drink too many and I am deeply embarrassed about the things I said. It was definitely a scary situation and I was frightened for my husband, but that is no excuse.”